Update to the update

Everything's back to normal, hopefully. I won't be sending GoDaddy.com a Christmas card this year, but unless they screw up again I'll probably stick with them out of laziness, if nothing else.

Now go check out those boards! They're all ready for you to post your brilliant thoughts! You've got some of those, right?

Update

Some of you may have noticed that some of the links/images aren't working right now. Sorry about that. It's completely GoDaddy.com's fault, as somehow in their infinite web service-provider wisdom, they deleted them all as they were migrating my server address.

Everything will be back up by this evening, and tomorrow I'm probably going to look for a new provider.

Happy times!

A Playground For Your Thoughts

We know you love us. Your lack of comments say “No!” but your podcast downloads say “Yes! Yes, PopWhore, take me now!” And who are we to mess with that kind of lust?

So, to better facilitate the fevered passion between your pop-starved loins and our sick minds, we’re thrilled to bring you the PopWhore Forums!

Please register and feel free to post about anything and everything.

If you want to puke every time you see Tom and Kate basking in the glow of their Thetan energy, if you have a strange fetish for Dixon Ticonderoga #2 pencils, or if you thought my ass looked fat in the last podcast...this is the place for you!

We know you have an opinion, why not open it up to ridicule? As Nick once so eloquently stated, “Opinions are like crushes on Kahlen, everyone’s got one.”

Go forth and love us. But not too much, because I tend to chafe easily.

More intelligent conversation

Do you want to see Eti and me IMing about sexual undertones in He-Man and She-Ra, and anti-semitism in Disney movies? Of course you do.

So click here for the transcript.

Pop Whore special Sunday edition

It feels like just yesterday we were doing the Metacast, but Pop Whore Episode 5 is already in the can. I mean, really -- we've produced a total of over five hours of content. If we were on the BBC, that'd be an entire season right there.

Click here to download Pop Whore Episode 5: The BrunchCast.

Click the "comments" link below to post your thoughts, questions, complaints, and phone numbers of witty brunette essayists or blonde second-place-finisher models.

Podcast Pre-Hype

We know life is hard. We know you agonized over whether to go see "Bewitched" or "Herbie - Fully Loaded." Yeah, we did too. So we know you're definitely coming back tomorrow night to check out our fifth, as yet untitled, podcast. Tune in to hear all about our recent adventures in popwhoredom, as well as a bunch of obscure, random shit as we get sidetracked time and time again.

Our podcast is guaranteed to be the equivalent of what Marky Mark did to Reese on the roller coaster. Yeah, you know exactly what I'm talking about. And remember...

You + Popwhore 4Eva

Real World in the IM World

Eti and I thought that as a way of beginning the commentary on the new season of Real World (they're in Austin now, apparently), we'd copy the portion of our morning instant messaging that dealt with that particular topic.

Some notes to be able to follow Eti's and my IM-speak:

• VM refers to Veronica Mars, and therefore Kristen Bell, the actress who plays her.
• RW, if it's not obvious, refers to The Real World.
• "Kissyface" was probably originated by some other website; however, Eti started using it earlier this year in reference to the much-hyped lesbian kissing on The O.C.; and now we both use it to refer to that sort of thing in general. (Sample usage by Eti: "Dude! Did you see the previews for next week? Kissyface!")

Eventually we'll publish a book of our IM abbreviations. It'd probably take multiple volumes.

And now, click here for the IM transcript.

On a special night and time, here's Episode 4: The RiloKast

Time to reveal the source of all the hype. Everything you heard was true, especially the part about bizarre technical difficulties, but it all turned out fine in the end. Enjoy 54 minutes of TV, movie, and pre-Rilo-Kiley-concert banter/discussion/argument/so forth.

Download Episode 4: The RiloKast here.

Oh, but you thought that was all? How'd you like a bonus post-concert mini-podcast, recorded in the car as Eti and I were driving back from the Wiltern? This was made possible by the iTalk voice recorder plugin for the iPod, a birthday gift courtesy of Rossanna and Tiago.

Bonus mini-podcast (Episode 4.5)

Do we take care of you guys or what? Feel free to post your comments, questions, grievances, and recipes for tzatziki below.

UPDATED: By the way, here are a couple of links to reviews of the show (Rilo Kiley's, not ours, but if anyone wants to review us we'd be more than willing) -- as well as some live pics.

Filter Magazine review

Live Daily review

Pics from the show

Let's get together and talk about the modern age...

Or we can get together and talk about (1) the podcast, (2) the superfuckingawesomespectacular show we went to last night, (3) the fact that we very nearly did not get into said show, and (4) Deborah Gibson.

First and foremost -- as for item (1), the podcast we recorded yesterday (Sunday) will be available for download tonight. Does it rock? Is it 50-something minutes of sheer brilliance? Is it a near-lethal dose of cool, distilled from the minds of the hottest guy and girl in all the podcasting nation? Did we have some bizarre technical difficulties resulting in at least 2 minutes of loud fuzz which I'm going to do my best to get rid of? Well, if you even need to ask these questions, you clearly haven't been listening, so check out the links on the right side of the page to hear our previous endeavors.

And, as far as the other stuff in that first paragraph is concerned, you're just going to have to STAY TUNED until this evening. Can you dig it? I knew that you could.

Mr. & Mrs. -- holy crap, Angelina is hot -- uh, Smith

Eti and I have both seen Mr. & Mrs. Smith in the past week. We didn't see it together, and as a result, no chatty teen lesbian couple materialized next to us as had happened when we attended Lords of Dogtown. Better flick this time, less proximity to girlish nookie. It's all part of God's plan, I suppose.

My team of crack research associates have informed me that the movie was originally planned as a Brad Pitt/Nicole Kidman vehicle. I'm not sure what our Hollywood betters were thinking, unless the script originally had a much darker ending in which either or both of them were killed. Because as we all know, Kidman is best suited to films where she is either dying or already dead. She's really, really good at that. To a preternatural extent; I mean, she doesn't even need any special makeup. (Shit, has anyone checked for a pulse lately?) But as a hot assassin who could kill your inhibitions with a look as she killed the rest of you with a bullet? Not so much.

Enter one Angelina Jolie. Despite her recent appearance on Inside the Actor's Studio (then again, who hasn't been on that), her body of work leaves something to be desired. Not her body of... body, though. Dubious achievement though it may be, she probably got about 100 times more people to sit through Tomb Raider than ever should have. In her all-too-brief appearance in Sky Crap-tain and the World of Boredom, she easily outshined Gwyneth "Screen Presence" Paltrow. And in some women's magazine poll, she was voted the #1 female celebrity that otherwise straight girls would want to sleep with. (Her response to the news was that she'd also be the most likely to sleep with them.) What's not to like? She just needed the right movie, and it sure as hell wasn't Taking Lives.

So is this finally the movie that would prove Angelina + not-completely-sucky script = unmitigated brilliance?

Well, here's the thing. No, Mr. & Mrs. Smith isn't the blisteringly hot, action-and-smoldering-glance-packed film that it was sold to us as (why'd it have to be PG-13 anyway?), but it does the job. There's enough action, intermittent laughter, and, yes, smoldering glances (plus a little bit of smoldering other stuff, but not nearly enough) to pretty much sustain a movie. There are gaps in believability. For example, in the very first scene, the couple admits they haven't done it in a while. Seriously? Would anyone of the opposite gender married to one of them really let the bed go cold for more than 20 minutes? I kinda doubt it. There's also the annoying Charlie's Angels-ish way that people are able to track down crucial, super-secret information with an average of four keystrokes or less. Yeah, I realize a movie like this isn't meant to be taken seriously. But once you stop taking it seriously, you stop caring about the characters, and that means there better be enough explosions and sex to hold your interest. Was there? Well, almost. Mostly explosions. And this movie does them very well and very frequently. Not all CGI-ish, either; it looks like they really blew shit up. Good car chase too, but that's no surprise since Doug Liman even pulled off a great one of those in Go on about one-ninetieth the budget.

It's only in the last twenty minutes that things kind of fall apart, because that's when you realize that there's nothing interesting left to happen. Either they're going to make it or they're not. And what do you think? Is this a Scandinavian black-and-white art house angstfest, or a $150 million summer movie from the talented writer of XXX: State of the Union? But you know what? It's still okay, because Angelina doesn't have one bad scene in the movie. There is no crappy line or plot point that she can't extinguish with her fiery Angelina-ness. That may not have been enough to save most of her other films, but it's just right for this one.

Oh, and Brad Pitt's a good looking guy and a good actor too, if you're into that sort of thing.

Shut the Fuck Up!

I’m sorry, but “Hells Kitchen” fucking rocks. I can’t think of many activities as enjoyable as coming home on a Monday night and unwinding with chef Gordon Ramsey. And yes, I’m totally crushing. Gordon Ramsey, curling his index finger and chillingly yelling, “come here, you!” God, that’s sexy! Gordon Ramsey, donned in black, playing darts at Cat & Fiddle on Sunset. Hot! Gordon Ramsey, hooking eliminated contestants’ chef coats on the little meat hook hangers. Move over, Leatherface!

One of the many things I love about the show is how incredibly fast-paced it is. Unlike most reality shows, the show doesn't bother wasting much time letting you get to know the contestants. The only time we ever get a glimpse of what they’re like outside the kitchen is while they’re whining outside in a cloud of smoke or passing kidney stones. Yeah, whatever. And if you’re ever unaware, there’s always the trusty narrator to remind you exactly what’s going on. I wonder what that’s like...

“Eti isn’t fairing well. She’s realized that the copier has run out of paper mid-motion. She must act quickly to ensure that each page is copied correctly.”

The other thing about the show that I find quite enjoyable, is that you know exactly who’s going to be eliminated. There are no surprises. There’s no Trump saying, “Michael, you were sweating while you cooked the lobster. I hate people who sweat. You’re out!” There’s no bullshit he-said she-said or psychobabble. No, “I was such a beautiful chef growing up that I wanted to cut my face with a fileting knife.” The show basically cuts out all the unnecessary reality show foreplay of “I wonder who’s going to get eliminated?” It’s just, you suck, get out. And for that, I am grateful more than words can say.

The one downside? I always get hungry after the show. It doesn’t fail. Yesterday, I lay in bed dreaming of salad with feta cheese. Not sure how I came to that, but it sounded really good.

Anyway, as for last night’s episode, I think Jeff was a total pussy and I have serious doubts as to the lady who got sick off of Andrew’s salty risotto. Speaking of Andrew, that kid’s got creepy-ass Scott Peterson written all over him. Ew.

Drunkaoke, Bulgariaoke, Etceteraoke...

If you’ve been a good little Pop Whore minion, then you’re well aware of the fact that our little Nick just turned twenty-seven. And with that, came the need to fulfill the promise I made to get drunk at his party. Since I gave up beer on my birthday last year, I had to arm myself with shots. Lots of shots. In fact, I ended up finishing about a half bottle of Baccardi Razz, which, as Rossanna pointed out, tastes a lot like cough syrup. I maintain that it’s more like Ludens cough drops with a kick. But, semantics.

We made our way to Zip Fusion in Little Tokyo, which is where we went last year, only back then, it was known to us as the little ghetto karaoke dive “Peppermint.” Apparently, Zip Fusion was too cool for us and all booked up. So we stumbled across the street to this other place called Yuu Yuu. Now, I don’t speak Japanese, but I think Yuu Yuu means, we don’t serve alcohol or have “Don’t Stop Believing.” Oooh, evil.

Luckily, I came prepared with my stash of Baccardi Razz. Good for me. Not good for every sober person in the room who had to live through my rendition of “Faith,” tushy shaking and all. Yeah, sorry about that you guys.

However, we made the best of it and duetted a bunch of shitty pop songs...including “Come Clean,” “Complicated,” “Accidentally In Love”...and some not so shitty ones, including “Vacation,” “Dress You Up,” “Daydream Believer” and “Come On Eileen.”

I even got to sing “All The Things She Said” with Rossanna, a real live Russian...who sang the chorus in Russian, no less. And despite the fact that in Russia, karaoke sings you, to Nick’s dismay, there was no girl-on-girl action in little Tokyo that night.

Notable duet of the evening had to go to Rossanna and Tiago for their kick ass rendition of “It’s My Life,” only to be shat upon by a lackluster version of prequel song, “Livin’ On A Prayer,” sung by Nick and I.

Next year, we go in search of Bulgarian karaoke...otherwise coined by Nick as Bulgariaoke.

Bright and early (Pacific time, anyway), here's Episode 3!

Episode 3: The UnbirthdayCast has arrived. I would say, if nothing else, it's the most audible podcast we've done thus far, since I took more time to mess with the levels and got Eti to sit closer to her mic. After being a few inches from her for over an hour, the mic is now in love with her; but what can you do.

Today I'm offering the podcast in two flavors: a regular MP3, and a better quality AAC (for which you'll need a relatively recent version of iTunes). I'm putting the AAC on a different page for boring technical reasons which I'm not going to bother explaining. So...

Download the MP3 here.

Or click here to go to my other blog to download the AAC version.

Happy Friday!

UPDATED: Cast your vote in the comments! Which is the better movie, Hackers or Being John Malkovich? Prove one of us wrong! Preferably Eti!

Friday, Friday, Friday

I think everyone should download our podcast on Friday morning, since no one is actually going to see "Mr. and Mrs. Smith". I mean, would you rather waste your time watching Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt having really hot sex or listen to an hour of Nick and I discussing "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants" and Scientology's newest member, Katie Holmes?!!

Okay fine, how about us talking about Hell's Kitchen, Sarah Vowell and the teen angst filled Harry Potter 4 teaser trailer?

Fine. Then will you at least download the podcast to listen to the story of how I found a quarter? An actual U.S. quarter, you guys!!! Score!

We Enjoy Your Comments...Really.

Nick and I like words. We like them even more when people leave us some. Even if it's just a snarky comment. So, if you're a new visitor or a lurker and think we mumble too much or don't know shit, please, let us know. It gives us the warm and fuzzies all over.

I Need An Adult

Nick just put me in a bad place by playing to my ego while peer pressuring me to blog. Which is fine because I can handle bad places, so long as they’re not in my bathing suit area.

I work for a law firm and am currently ensconced in a very heady Motion writing session. Yesterday was a thirteen and a half hour day and I’m sure today won’t be any different. (Hence the lack of podcasting until Thursday night) So, if any of you ever need me to Oppose a Motion to Annul, I’m your girl. I suppose that’s why Nick said that I’m a girl (on some days more than others)...and mentioned that I’m “good at writing stuff.”

Nick and I decided to start Pop Whore because it seemed like the only natural extension of our sordid pop culture drenched conversations and IMs. After one too many “oh, man, we should’ve thought of that or done that,” we decided, no more! Or at least Nick decided and then forced my stubborn ass into it. I guess some people have therapy...others have Pop Whore.

So, if you’re a person who takes comfort in the fact your shitty day will only get better with some TiVo and iTunes, then welcome to our virtual shtetl of pop debauchery.

And speaking of caves, remember that episode of “Lost” where I ended up on the island and led Boone into one of the caves only to emerge like 5 hours later? Or was that the “too hot for TV” episode that ABC couldn’t air? Hmmmmm. Guess we'll have to wait for the DVDs.

But until then...check out the metacast and podcast

Waiting's a bitch, isn't it?!!

Greetings, newcomers

For some reason we've gotten more hits today than ever in our brief podcasting/blogging career. Hey, this is just like when everybody started moving into the caves on Lost. Remember that episode? It was after we knew Kate was a hot psycho criminal, but well before we knew Hurley was a gazillionaire jinx.

We won't be able to do our next podcast until probably Thursday night, but there's plenty to entertain you until then. You can download the 2 previous podcasts here and here (see, I'm not even making you scroll down to get them; that's the kind of stand-up guy I am), and there's plenty of blog posts, the better with which to waste even more of your time.

Maybe Eti can follow up with a message of her own. I think more people will read that. Because Eti's a girl, and everyone likes girls. Also, she's good at writing stuff.

Kathy Najimy vs. The Snapple Lady

For the record...

Kathy Najimy is NOT Wendy Kaufman, the Snapply Lady.

Once again, for Nick...

Kathy

Wendy

Finally, Episode 2

Pop Whore Episode 2: Untitled is now available for download --

RIGHT HERE.

This time we clocked in at a solid 68 minutes, so I had to compress it a little more to keep the file size manageable. Enjoy such varied topics as blood donation, airplane sightings, season finales, and of course, one little Israeli girl's introduction to America through the cultural kaleidoscope of Punky Brewster.

Also, I didn't say "like" as much this time.