Semi-Live Blogging II: This is what we actually talk about

Here follows a condensed transcript of everything we IMed about for an entire day. Read at your own risk.

8:17 - 8:20: Nick arrives and begins the day's discussion with the following well-planned and brilliantly executed witticism: "ok". The conversation proceeds to our respective soreness from Sunday's kickball game. Selected remark from Eti: "I'm sure everyone is looking at me walking around going, "Man, she must've gotten ass rammed."

8:21: The first MP3 of the day is exchanged as Eti sends Nick the Death Cab for Cutie song "Soul Meets Body," apparently from their upcoming album.

8:23 - 8:40: As Nick listens to the Death Cab song, Eti mentions the recent singleness of Keira Knightley, and a brief moment is spent wondering if Nick has a shot with her. Then we discuss covers we've heard lately: Don Ho singing "Shock the Monkey," some guy named Ted Leo doing "Since You've Been Gone" and "Maps," some punk/metal covers of "Milkshake," and of course Jessica Simpson's slutted-up version of "These Boots Are Made For Walking," including the nasty tidbit that the video was directed by Brett Ratner.

8:41: It's agreed that Brett Ratner is going to seriously fuck up X-Men 3. Nick points out that had Joss Whedon directed it instead, he might have gotten a part for Evan Rachel Wood (because he's that cool).

8:42: Yep, it's barely been 25 minutes and already our mutual fascination with Evan Rachel Wood (abbreviated ERW by us for convenience) has taken over the discussion.

8:43 - 9:00: We review ERW's upcoming slate of movies (after Pretty Persuasion, which opens on Friday and is destined to be genius). There is some snickering over the fact that she's starring in something called "Down in the Valley." In any case, her filmography looks very promising. First she has "Running With Scissors," which also features Olivia Wilde (aka Alex on The OC) and is directed by Ryan Murphy, creator of Nip/Tuck. Then she appears in "The Mermaids Singing" with Neve Campbell, veteran of more than a few same-sex encounters. After that she does a musical for Julie Taymor set in 60's England with a lot of Beatles music. We agree that ERW doing a British accent is destined to be hot, and hope that somehow Keira Knightley makes her way into that movie.

9:00 - 9:02: Did you know that the original script for Bend it Like Beckham had Keira Knightley's and Parminder Nagra's characters falling in love? We do, and we take this opportunity to remind ourselves how much better the movie would have been had they stuck to that story.

9:03: Nick relates another story from Rebels On The Backlot. Long story short: in Fight Club, Marla's line "I haven't been fucked like that since grade school" was originally "I want to have your abortion," but Fincher changed it at a producer's request. After he changed it, she begged him to put back the original line, but he wouldn't.

9:04: Eti goes to pee. Yes, we have bodily functions like anyone else.

9:09 - 9:15: Eti returns and Nick informs her that Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire has been rated PG-13. Eti hopes this means that Ron and Hermione will hook up. Nick hopes for an Evan Rachel Wood cameo. (Duh.)

9:30: Nick goes to Starbucks.

9:45: Nick returns from Starbucks, having remembered a food site he found earlier in the week called "Chocolate and Zucchini." This is ironically similar to the original title of Pop Whore, which was Dark Chocolate and Celery Sticks (we'll explain that later).

10:00: Free tickets to Eisley at the Troubadour on August 22! If you don't know Eisley, listen to them (try "Lost at Sea"). They're great. We love them. We're seeing them for free. We're on top of the freaking world.

10:12: Having figured out the whole ticket-printing system for the Eisley tickets, we discuss our next concert on the docket -- the Decemberists on September 13th at the Henry Fonda. We saw them there back in April and they rocked the house.

10:25: While checking the Henry Fonda Theater site, Nick notices he missed Tegan & Sara at that venue last week. FUUUUUUUUCK! Now they're touring in Australia. (The fact that T&S are lesbian twins might inspire a lesser-minded person to make a "Down Under" joke, but rest assured Nick and Eti did no such thing. Really. We swear.)

10:38 - 10:57: Eti continues on her quest, begun several months ago and continued last night at the Coffee Bean in Encino, to convince Nick to see The Exorcist. She's barking up the wrong tree. Nick relates his story of seeing The Shining, wherein he ended up looking away a lot. (Hey, he was a lot younger then. Like 13. Well, okay, 16. ALL RIGHT, HE WAS 18! Happy?!) Eti proposes that he convert to Judaism so as to keep him safe from Pazuzu, but he declines. Eti then admits that while The Exorcist is mentally scary, she is easily and totally creeped out by The Exorcist III. She hypothesizes that forcing Nick to watch The Exorcist would be the equivalent of Nick forcing her to sit outside in the dark in the middle of nowhere watching Unsolved Mysteries for 2 hours. Suffice it to say that we cordially agree to refrain from doing either and make plans to see "Pretty Persuasion" this weekend instead.

11:17: Some discussion of Elyse Sewell, third-place finisher in the first season of America's Next Top Model. Also a strong competitor for the title of Girl Who Nick Just Might Kick Sarah Vowell Out of Bed For. She's pretty, sure, but she also seems to be possibly the smartest girl in the world. And one of the best bloggers. And she wrote The Shins' bio that appears on their webpage (while she was dating keyboardist Marty Crandall). And she did most of this before turning 23. We are both a little bit scared of her, honestly. She'll probably be Supreme Ruler of the Universe by her late 20's.

12:08: Time for lunch (for Nick). If you really need to know, he ate at Scallion's in Westwood. Good Kung-Pao tofu there.

12:56: Nick returns from lunch. In a minor coincidence, Eti has ordered lunch from Kung Pao Bistro in Sherman Oaks. (This is nothing compared to the coincidence that will occur later, so stay tuned.) Eti has been reading Elyse's blog and turns up this quote, which is just one of many showcasing her brilliance: "It just doesn't take sixteen hours of my time for me to look good walking in your fashion show, dammit, not to mention that, all told, I could make more money working the same number of hours at Starbucks. Ugh, I'm getting angry just thinking about it. But this time around I resolve to be an exemplary silent and compliant clotheshanger. I shall listen to my iPod and shan't say "fuck" to anybody."

1:09: Nick and Eti both go to make copies. (Yes, we actually do some work occasionally.)

1:35: Lunch time for Eti. Time for Nick to do some more work.

2:17: Eti relates her fortune cookie fortunes. (Fun fact: the word "taste" is pronounced "wei-dao" in Chinese.)

2:32: Here's the coincidence in question. We'll leave out how we got onto this topic, because you'd think we were crazy. More than you already do. Anyway, we're talking about racing each other to hell. Nick says "I'll just start running over babies or puppies or something," and RIGHT IN THE EXACT SAME MOMENT Eti types "just run over some puppies or something." Seriously, we both thought about running over puppies at the same time. Are we twisted or what?

2:40: Things get meta as we discuss how the live-blogging transcript is coming.

2:45: Eti says she's too busy to work on the live-blogging. Boo. Nick takes the reins.

3:18: Rossanna IMs us to say she's listening to our last podcast. Yay! She says the levels sound great. Of course they do.

3:45: Nick reads over TVGasm's recap of yesterday's Laguna Beach, despite not having watched the show. It's pretty funny nonetheless. Eti hasn't seen it and reminds herself to download it.

4:00: Time to do some more work. Aren't we productive?

4:15: Eti sends over the aforementioned Don Ho cover of "Shock the Monkey." That's some bizarre shit. It's not quite in William Shatner territory, but it's about 2 exits away.

4:40: Nick gets in some more complaining about the upcoming Adam Sandler film "Click," which has taken over his parking lot at work. As with every other Sandler film, he will not be seeing it.

4:45: Discussion of the Don Ho song. Nick didn't know he was a singer, whereas Eti didn't know he was an actor. This is why, as a team, we would kick ass on Jeopardy.

4:59: We try to get a little work done in the minute we have left. Actually, Eti burns a CD. But our hearts are in the right place.

5:00: And we bid farewell until our next inevitable coincidence/jinx-ridden discussion the next morning.