Seven-of-nine-of-twelve-steps
On the heels of the news that the O.C. will start months earlier than we'd expected comes word that Jeri Ryan will be joining the cast as a fellow rehabber who befriends Kirsten. This marks an interesting career turn for Ms. Ryan, who used to specialize in teenage boy lock-the-bathroom-door roles: first a hot alien with requisite skintight outfit on Star Trek: Voyager, then a Van Halen video-esque teacher on Boston Public.
Anyway, now we can speculate as to the nature of the friendship that will develop between Kirsten and Jeri. Will Jeri be the hopelessly screwed-up wretch who makes Kirsten realize that her life is really pretty darn good? The spunky party girl who pulls her off the wagon for midnight trips to the watering hole down the street? Or maybe even the hyper-religious fanatic who can't stop talking about how liquor is the devil's blood and they're both going to hell unless they can bleed out the remnants, and just wait over here while I sharpen my stiletto heel on the windowsill? (Okay, that last one probably belongs on The Inside, but oh right they CANCELLED THAT.)
I guess we'll have to stay tuned.
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For those of you who don't read spoilers, Jeri Ryan will be playing "Charlotte Morgan." So, of course the dialogue is sure to go a little something like this:
Kirsten: Hi, I'm Kirsten.
Charlotte: Hi, I'm Charlotte.
Kirsten: Man, I need a drink.
Charlotte: Why don't we go get some exercise. Afterwards, I'll let you lick my arm. I've been told I taste like vodka after a good run.
Kirsten: Okay. By the way, was that a tomato garden I saw out there?
And........SCENE!
Oh. My. God. You PEOPLE ARE DRIVING ME TO DRINK.
If the drink is mojitos, you better be inviting us over. Especially because Eti just washed her neck.
I'll wash YOUR neck, vermin!
We at Popwhore would like to remind you that if you have nothing nice to say...then say it to Nick.
We at PopWhore would also like to encourage you to forward Eti your extra dental dam coupons.
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